Solitary confinement

solitaire

How to be comfortable in your own company…

 

I believe it is possible to be both a sociable person and at the same time someone who is comfortable in their own company. I’ve always enjoyed having time on my own and spent many a happy hour reading a good book, blog surfing, binge-watching a DVD box set, immersing myself in a cookery challenge or even taking in a movie at the cinema on my own (admittedly I’m only prepared to do this for a matinee – going alone in the evening would still bother me even now!).

I notice now that two things that very much characterise my life, parenting and blogging, are a funny mixture of the solitary and the sociable. On the one hand blogging can be a very sociable activity – all about communicating with others, supporting and sharing ideas. On the other it is by it’s very nature, solitary and not an easy thing to share with your nearest and dearest simply because it is so personal – it is as far from a team activity as it’s possible to get!

With parenting, you’re never alone – those little people do tend to be on your lap, in your ear, next to you as you head for the toilet… yet at the same time, it can be a lonely game – solitary in as much as adult company can be sorely missed some days and it can be boring and it can be isolating.

On the whole though, I have mostly positive connotations attached to the word ‘solitary’ – as I mentioned, being solitary can (and often does) give me the headspace I need to feel happy. This was always the way too, not just since having children.

On top of everything else another solitary activity has come to my notice lately. A friend recently recommended a podcast which she’d been listening to – you might have heard of it: “Serial” – one American journalist’s dissection of a cold case murder for which the wrong man may have been convicted. I then began catching little mentions here and there and succumbed to downloading the first few episodes on my phone.

I have not been a big one for podcasts up to now, literally only ever really listening to the Adam & Joe show in the past whilst out exercising (alone, obvs), but I got absolutely hooked by ‘Serial’ and after the last episode found myself scrabbling around for something to replace this experience.

Yesterday (after the development of my new *discovery*) I searched on Caitlin Moran to see if she had any stand up or other spoken material to download and found an interview recorded at the Edinburgh Book Festival plugging How to Be a Woman. It was such an entertaining listen I found myself popping the earphones in at every opportunity, unwilling to walk away from something that was ticking all my happiness boxes.

Maybe I’m too happy in my own company? Is that possible?

This post was written with this week’s Prompt from Mum Turned Mom in mind: Solitary

 

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10 thoughts on “Solitary confinement

  1. You’re so right about blogging and parenting being a strange mix of sociable and solitary. I think I enjoy them both precisely for that reason! I’m learning to be much better at enjoying my own company as I get older – though of course the chances for that nowadays are few and far between… X
    Sophie Lovett recently posted…In pursuit of sleepMy Profile

  2. I remember the early days of being a parent being quite lonely at times and then there are the occasions where you attempt to socialise at a playgroup and end up on your own the whole time with no one talking to you. i would rather be on my own through choice than in that sort of situation.

    With three children, all now older and independent, I enjoy time to myself. They are noisier and more opinionated than they ever were, so you tend to relish the moments of peace and quiet!
    Nicola Young recently posted…Friday Fiction – 10 Verbs, 10 NounsMy Profile

  3. I’ve always enjoyed my own company, more so as I’ve got older. And, probably even more since I had children! I think it’s good to be happy by yourself, and I also think that those quiet moments allow you to appreciate the noisy ones more x Thank you so much for sharing with #ThePrompt x
    Sara (@mumturnedmom) recently posted…Siblings: February 2015My Profile

  4. Such a great read, I can really relate. I think it’s important to enjoy your own company. I’ve found that it lifts the need to go searching elsewhere for company you enjoy. And yes when you have children on or around you, getting those quiet moments alone are rare, but highly cherished.
    Sarah recently posted…Menu Monday #6My Profile

  5. I don’t think it’s a bad thing to be happy in your own company – perhaps it’s a bad thing to be too happy in your own company if you become a hermit refusing any other human company, but I imagine you’re a very long way away from that stage! We all need our own time to recharge. I’m similar – I’m an introvert, and enjoy my own company. I do enjoy the company of others, but then need solitary recharging time xx #ThePrompt
    Leigh – Headspace Perspective recently posted…The Quest for the Perfect Hot ChocolateMy Profile

  6. I love my own company, sometimes I prefer the quiet and the time to do something just for me. I also enjoy the hustle of a full house and being with friends and family and in great company x

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