I may not be the best person to be making bold statements about such things, a lot of stressful things have happened recently and I haven’t exactly taken everything in my stride, but, as I get older and I spend time reflecting on my own way of reacting to certain things, I realise that I’m actually quite good at keeping the yin and yang in balance and not allowing myself to be swept up in an emotionally charged response to potentially negative news.
I’ve read other people recently talking about certain things – the end of a breastfeeding journey for example – and really agonising over it. I look back at my own experience and I realise that (certainly second time round) when I made a decision to stop breastfeeding that was it. What good is the agonising? The same goes for parent guilt – something most of us feel at some point.
I also find myself endlessly wondering how people manage to get so worked up to a head of righteous steam over certain stories that appear in the tabloids – for example the recent Victoria Beckham ‘kiss-gate’. Of course I would defend anyone’s right and the normality of kissing your own child on the lips but for heavens sake – what a furore! Yes there were people who made some completely idiotic comments but can’t we all just agree that people are idiots and leave it there? Does it really need 700 angry defensive blog posts/Facebook rants?
I just want to be clear that I’m not advocating a ‘who gives a s*it?’ attitude – more that there are journalists out there who enjoy stirring up a hornets nest – it sells papers. But don’t forget todays papers are tomorrow’s chip wrappers.
Maybe I’m just lucky I wasn’t brought up as a Catholic (or a Jew if Woody Allen’s public persona is anything to go by!) and we are all just products of our upbringing – the things we learned to think and feel about ourselves at an impressionable age.
I can’t speak for anyone else because if it was that easy to just ‘let go’ of those thoughts and feelings then there would be a lot of psychiatrists and counsellors out of a job. And I also realise that some things in life are just stressful by their very nature – especially if money or health are involved – but there seems to be an awful lot of agonising over stuff that really isn’t that big a deal in the long run.
I want my children to grow up feeling secure enough about themselves that they can assess any given situation and make a choice not to sweat the small stuff. I’ve never read Richard Carlson’s book but it sounds like bloody good advice! OK now I’ve just read a snippet and frankly I could have written that – in fact, I promise right now that I’m not plagiarising – Ha ha!
I’ll just stop now.