Further adventures in potty training

EJ on the jobI remember those early-ish days with JJ, my eldest, when me and my NCT friends began discussing the possibility of second children. We all knew that most siblings turn out like chalk and cheese so half of us got to feel a little bit smug while the other half laughed nervously and we all secretly crossed our fingers and hoped for the best.

For my part, I just longed for a child who would be chilled, completely by-pass the five hour an evening colicky screaming session, sleep half decently and just be contented. Don’t get me wrong, I love JJ with all my heart but unfortunately I will never be able to look back on the baby days through rose-coloured spectacles. It was sheer hell.

So then EJ? I hear you ask. Well, yes, in actual fact, EJ did me proud. He did have a little cry every night round about 7pm but I was a pro at just sticking him in the stretchy sling and bouncing him around for a bit – it was massively different to the experience with his brother. I also opted to give up on breastfeeding very earlywith EJ when it became clear that the difficulties I’d had with JJ had massively impacted on my mental health at the time which meant that I was unable to enjoy any of the experience of new motherhood.

However, JJ did one thing extremely well. Potty training. Essentially he turned three, started pre-school and within a couple of weeks I decided to take the plunge and bin the nappies. And by jove if he didn’t get it! Within two weeks he was done and dusted (let’s not mention that one particularly traumatic softplay moment…). He never had an ‘in-pant’ ‘code-brown’ incident, our sofas and carpets may be a bit grubby but they don’t bear any scars from that period in JJ’s life.

So here we are, three years later and EJ is seven weeks into his little nappy/pant transition. As you may know already it hasn’t all been plain sailing, but things had calmed down, he was having less and less accidents and those he was having were semi-damp moments which indicated that things had started unexpectedly, the brakes had been applied before hitting more acceptable receptacles than his own undies.

But lately? It’s all gone a bit Pete Tong. We have had full on wees on various carpets which are only announced quite positively past tense. This has happened some days two or three times in a row with a really measured talking to given between each incident including eye contact and insistence that he can now assure us that he will let us know before not after next time round.

Yesterday saw him go through the two spare outfits we had taken to my parents and move into the more eclectic wardrobe left over there from when his female cousins were little.

All this might be manageable but the worst of it was last Friday morning down at our local rec. It was pretty early and we were the only ones down there. I had taken a coffee along and was searching for a dry place to sit down while the boys ran off to scale the highest height imaginable when, across the way a little voice called out the one phrase I don’t ever want to hear again from a child halfway up a climbing frame: “Mummy, I’ve done a poo”. I did a double-take, stuttered “you..you’ve done a what? You haven’t actually done a poo yet, right?”… “Yes Mummy, I’ve done a poo”.

Six seconds later we had flown into the delightful public toilets and I realised the full extent of what I was faced with. Thank the Good Lord I had actually remember to take wipes with me (many’s a time I have forgotten them). Obvs I also had a change of pantage but what I didn’t have was a plastic bag in which to deposit any kind of soiled item and so I did the only reasonable thing under the circumstances. Binned them.

So now I am left wondering just what exactly is going wrong. I looked around the faces of my family yesterday afternoon and admitted I was concerned. Regression. It’s not uncommon but I guess there are also reasons for it. I have my suspicions about what may have affected him in the last week or so, I just hope it can be rectified because I point blank refuse to put him back into nappies now.

Have you experienced this or got any words of wisdom or advice? I’d love some reassurances!


And then the fun began...


9 thoughts on “Further adventures in potty training

  1. Oh hon what a mare! Really hope it’s a short lived regression. My only advice, for what it’s worth, is definitely DON’T put him back into nappies. Even if he’s having accidents for a month. Apparently it can confuse the living daylights out of them, and have disastrous consequences. Best of luck my lovely xxx
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  2. Ah, I feel for you. If itmakes you feel any better, it took quite a while for us to potty train Helen, our eldest, but we did start far too young. Her sister, well, she has been very easy, but you don’t want to hear that! When it comes to poo in pants, t’s happened a couple of times and the offending item is binned immediately. I wouldn’t even consider washing them! Not much use on the advice front am I? Other than persevere. He’ll get there eventually. Thanks for hosting #thetruthabout
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  3. I think for many kids potty training is a U shaped learning thing. I remember just before our girl “got it” she had a massive regression. I was like…WTF! trying not to outwardly despair…and then the next week, it all just clicked into place forever more so I’m crossing my fingers for you. x #thetruthabout

  4. I feel your pain! The boys were plain sailing for me compared to the wee girl, which was so unexpected I didn’t deal with at well as I might have 🙂 But, she did get there, quite suddenly, and it’s all been fine since then! Sadly, what works for one child, really doesn’t seem to work for all kids when it comes to this one! So hang in there, it will get better, and definitely don’t go back to nappies x
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  5. Oooh well I’ve skim read some of the other comments Sam and me?, well I’d go back to nappies. There. I’ve said it. At the risk of sounding like a wanna-be super nanny, our little ones really do feel our anxieties and feed off them. My guess is that one day soon, he’ll decide he’s ready and it’ll be cracked within a week or 2 with only a handful of mishaps. (A bit presumptious maybe, seeing as I don’t know your son… sorry!) Good luck 🙂
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  6. Oh, potty training really is the worst! My little one does pretty well most of the time, but we still have a few days here and there where she seemingly forgets all about the toilet! I hope you can get on to drier days soon! #thetruthabout

  7. I believe in any family, there is always one child is doesn’t sleep, one who is a nightmare to wean and one who is impossible to potty train. I threw away many a pair of pants with my middle one. Rest assured, at 13, she’s fully dry both day and night 😉 You’ll get there. Hang in there! x
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